Summary

Don't let the suit fool you, Megatron is still 100% a Platinum champion of the Koan pit.

Story

Megatron hated galas. He’d hated them since the novelty wore off — the novelty of being rich enough, important enough, required to attend them.

Once, the invitation alone would’ve meant he’d won. Now? It just meant another evening of political theatre, lukewarm high‑grade champagne, and watching Optimus Prime flirt with unity while the humans fawned over their war trophies.

The only real highlight? Watching what Starscream wore. That — and the high‑grade champagne. Even that had started to taste watered down.

Still, as the leader of the Decepticons, he was required to attend these “Unity Events” with his second‑in‑command. For appearances. For balance. Balance — as Prime liked to preach.

So when a massive cake was wheeled in, with “Autobots” spelled wrong in red icing… Megatron assumed it was strippers.

He was only half wrong. Terrorists. Wannabe revolutionaries, playing at rebellion with shaky hands and 3D‑printed weapons.

It took everything in his power not to laugh — his arm around a shaking Starscream. But his Seeker wasn’t afraid. She was laughing.

Terrorist Leader: Tie these two together. Femme’s shaking in her designer heels. Pathetic.

Megatron: Some bolts, giving me orders.

Optimus: Megatron! Stand down. I have this. Please, old friend. There’s no need for your temper.

Starscream: He asked for it.

Megatron: Oh, why not. Optimus, they’re all yours.

Terrorist Leader: That’s… not the chair I assigned you!

Megatron: So?

Starscream: By the way, my heels are perfectly custom.

Starscream: Nah.

Starscream: Gasp!

Young Mech: I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! Where does it hurt?!

Starscream: Oh, this is your first time, isn’t it?

A red‑tipped claw brushed the center of Megatron’s chest — a silent cue. He looked down. Starscream was watching him. Locked optics. Just them.

A snicker slipped from his vents. A wide grin spread across his face — all fangs and fondness, mirrored by Starscream’s own.

He turned, walked past the appointed chair — and chose his own. And sat. Clunk. His full resting weight landed like a gavel.

Then — the soft click of heels on marble. Starscream followed, calm as a queen, as if the ballroom hadn’t just turned into a hostage crisis.

She paused, about to say more. Tilted her head. Then waved it off with a smirk.

She sat. Right in Megatron’s lap. Exactly the way the terrorist had wanted.

A young mech stepped forward with a chain, hands trembling. He began to wrap the chains around them — gingerly, carefully.

Megatron laughed with her. The livestream drones twirled about the gala, giving the Neonet one hell of a show.

Livestream Chat

Prime finally threw a damn good party — complete with explosives, armed revolutionaries, and Megatron tied to a chair like a bored god at brunch. At least, according to Megatron.

The pathetic terrorists with their 3D‑printed guns had swarmed the Cybertronian Unity… whatever… gala.

Honestly, Megatron hated these things. They were just lovely excuses for Prime to preach and glad‑hand with the humans — all on livestream, of course. Optimus Prime was passionate about an open‑door policy with the public.

Megatron had never been so entertained at a gala.

He was tied to a chair with weak little iron chains, arms straight down, resting on his knees.

Click. Latch.
The sound of Megatron’s platinum chain being latched to Starscream’s ruby pendant. A feeling of love — of comfort — ran between them.

He almost shuddered.

Megatron looked down at the purring creature chained to his lap. Chest to chest. Her legs folded neatly over his thigh. The dress, which he happened to like, clung to her like spilled ink.

Sweetheart neckline, off‑the‑shoulder bell sleeves — hugging her frame like a glove in deep midnight black. Starscream’s cheek was pressed to his chest, the ruby choker fused to her neck cables latched firmly to Megatron’s platinum chain.

Which, frankly, had put both warlords in a very lovely mood.

Megatron: Starscream…

(low and syrup‑thick, curling up through his vents)

Starscream: Mmm?

(not looking up, claws dragging along his lapel)

Megatron: You’re enjoying this. We’re technically hostages.

Starscream: Oh? Are we?

Because I am latched to my platinum king, who looks so very good in these weak little chains. Like a present wrapped in a ribbon.

I probably should care about the terrorist with the gun, but…

You smell so good. Like gunmetal… high‑grade… and something else? New cologne?

Megatron: Yes, actually. Not too bad?

Starscream: It’s bombastic.

Megatron: You and that word. Bombastic. You flatter me.

Starscream: Only when I need to.

(lashes lowering)

Starscream: Should we be afraid?

Megatron: I suppose. If they were competent.

(shouting erupts across the ballroom)

Megatron: Come here. Give us a kiss.

Megatron captured Starscream’s lips in a good, long kiss — completely forgetting about the livestream drones.

Normally, Megatron and Starscream were very private about their relationship. So this simple act of stealing a kiss, thinking no one was watching?

Neonet‑breaking.

Livestream Chat

Behind her, Megatron stood. The chains broke. His armor locked into gladiator form — echoing clicks like sacred gunfire.

His optics flared red.

Megatron: The more I think about you, the angrier I get. I led a revolution. I bled for it. Fought for it. Paid the cost in steel and spark. You mock it — with your plastic weapons and internet manifestos?

Starscream joined him — armor reshaping to elegance, wings wide.

Starscream: What’s a man to a king?

Megatron: What’s a king to a god?

The terrorist fainted.



A younger terrorist by the buffet lowered his weapon. “I… I think he peed himself.”

Another raised a hand. “Uh — do I surrender? To the cuddly ones? Or the angry blue one?”

Optimus: You surrender to the ideals of unity and—

Mech: To Megatron it is.

He sat down, locking his hands behind his head. Elita groaned. “I hate this century.”

Starscream: Shall I call our security team, darling? My Seekers are dying for something to do.

Megatron: No. Let Optimus deal with them.



Prime stood amid the wreckage, face twitching. Elita muttered something that might’ve been a prayer.

Across the ballroom, Megatron — cigar between his fangs — helped Starscream into her jacket.

Starscream: You really are magnificent. It’s been ages since I’ve seen you in your gladiator loadout.

Megatron: It has been a while, hasn’t it? The look on that brat’s face when you crushed his gun… Nothing finer.

Behind them, the ballroom still smoldered. Ahead, the press drones were already circling.


🗎 Council Summary Briefing — Internal Memo

From: Cybertronian Unity Oversight Council

To: Global Humanitarian Commission

Date: November 12, 2025

Subject: Incident Report – Unity Gala Hostage Crisis

No casualties. No demands. No press conference. Just… chaos.

They walked out arm‑in‑arm while we’re still running damage control.

This is the third incident in six months.

They don’t even make statements.

They just do things. And then leave. Like nothing happened.

And you want me to explain that to the Global Humanitarian Commission?

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